Hypnosis

Hypnosis.

The very word gives a thrill through one's body – be it of skepticism, arousal, fear, disbelief, wonderment, excitement, disdain.. It always elicits a reaction when brought up.

I am a hypnotist – of a sort. I am no professional, and I make no claims about being able to put anyone under, bend their will to my own, make them obey my every command. That is, frankly, impossible. Unless the subject is willing (even if only subconsciously so), they cannot be made to do anything at all whatsoever.

But I am her hypnotist. The feeling of submission my kitten gets when she goes under, when I am in such intimate, all-encompassing control of her, the feeling of obedience that bending her to my will gives her... Well, frankly, she needs it.

I do not say this in a power-trip fantasy. She has told me herself that she does, recently, and keeping that in mind I have been tending more to her needs, as well as my own.

She has always been into hypnosis and has been wonderful at guiding me into this foray. I stepped into hypnosis due to a slight interest, and largely her own interest, which she somewhat understated at the time.

Imagine, to my surprise, when the first time I finally tried it out on her.... it worked. Now, keep in mind, as I have said, I am no professional. I have never tried hypnosis on anyone but my kitten and never plan to try it on anyone else. I am her hypnotist and hers alone.

Anyhow... the first time led to a second. And a third. I found that I enjoyed it, it thrilled me in the most wonderful way. I was overcautious at first, and with good reason. An untried hypnotist can get into trouble. I started slow. Recently things have begun speeding up between us in general and I have found that I fear going too far, even as much as I feel that this is so very necessary...

But the control. The control on my part and lack of it on hers. The trust; that she will not allow me to go too far, and that I will not take things too far. Her submission and obedience to the fact that I can and will do what is best for her. The complete thrill of realising that with just one word I can take all of her worries and fears away...

I don't just want it any more. I need it too. Possibly as much as she does.

And I can finally say that I rejoice in that fact, and have accepted that it is no bad thing to need to control her in the way that she needs to be controlled.

This revelation came about today during a particularly intense session in which I realised that lacking control and being forced or compelled to submit to my will could be not only intensely pleasurable for her but also a release for her... and that it was also intensely pleasurable for me and a release for me to put her into that situation I had her in.

Needless to say this was not the last time a session such as that will happen, and even as she spends the entirety of her day being brought back to focus on her submission to me, I will spend the entirety of my day being brought back to my dominance over her, and to how wonderful it is to finally be finding our balance.